7 Simple Ways to Deepen Your Connection With Your Womb
For 26 years, I had no idea how disconnected I was from my body, especially my womb. We’re all born into these bodies—a makeup of minerals, water, and elements of the earth coupled with atoms and life force pulsing through our cells—and we learn how to use them over time.
We’re taught to be fed, walk around, use the bathroom, and hold things with our hands. As we get older, we begin to figure out more ways to use our physical vessels. And then for women, sometime around our teenage years we begin to bleed. I was a late bloomer with my period, she first came when I was around 16. Most girls begin their moon cycles between the ages of 10 and 15, but of course there’s some variation in there.
For many of us, we’re taught about our menstrual cycles from a physiological perspective, meaning that either in sex ed or speaking with our moms and sisters, we learn when our periods come, what to expect, and how to manage symptoms. That’s all cool and helpful, but then we’re left on our own for the next several years aside from our once a year check in with our OBGYNs. So going forward for many women, once a year at the doctor’s is when we actually begin to tune into our womb space, that is unless something is wrong.
I was totally one of those women. I would think about my cycle when I got my period once a month, but I always viewed it as an inconvenience instead of it being one of the most sacred miracles to ever exist in human history. It was literally not until my ovaries started exploding with ovarian cysts did I begin to connect with my womb, and if you’ve ever gone through reproductive dis-ease such as ovarian cysts, PCOS, endometriosis, or fibroids, then you know exactly what I mean.
Learning you have a reproductive disease can be so frightening. My first thought for years was that I am a healthy, young woman who, for my entire life, has never had a problem with my period or hormones or really any physical health issue for that matter. I was so confused what suddenly changed and why my “body began to fail me.” My Western doctors wanted to put me on birth control, but something in my intuition said absolutely not, this is a bandaid. I know birth control is a helpful option for many, but for me it did not resonate and I knew in my cells that it would be a bandaid to what was really going on.
Throughout my four year battle with chronic ovarian cysts and fibrocystic breast disease, I battled with my body. I would scream and yell at her. I was so confused why she couldn’t just be healthy, meanwhile I failed to realize all of the ways I had been abusing her, not honoring my authentic self, and had been so disconnected from my womb. I didn’t realize that my chronic ovarian cysts were my body’s way of getting my attention to all of the ways I had been steering further and further away from health and happiness. (You can read the full story of what I believe led to my ovarian cysts here, and then how I found healing here).
And then, it hit me. Slowly over the years I transitioned out of victimhood and anger and suppression for my condition into empowerment, awareness, and undivided attention. For the first time in my entire life at 26, I gave my womb my full attention and reconnected with her so deeply. I finally said, “Okay body, I trust you. Thank you so much for guiding me. Thank you for helping me discover all of the ways I had been steering off of my path and abusing you. Thank you for screaming at me in the form of exploding ovaries until I surrendered and decided to listen to where my womb, in connection with my heart, was guiding me. I reactivated my womb-heart connection, reconnected with the Earth Mother, and reconnected with the Cosmic Womb through my heart portal and soul.
In fully surrendering, I finally gave in and quit my initial dream job in NYC and moved to a tiny island without a plan to just take care of myself and let my body heal. And she did. And now, I am more connected to my authentic self than ever. More importantly, I reconnected with my womb and now I let my womb, in connection with my heart, guide every step of my life. As women, our wombs are literally portals to heaven. They are our direct connection to spirit. Life itself is birthed through us—a straight up miracle. Each month during our moon cycles we shed all that no longer serves and are rebirthed anew. Within our wombs, creations are formed outside of life itself—ideas, dreams, art, passions. Everything in this reality is birthed through a womb and we are so fucking blessed to be women.
Because of society’s oppression of women, capitalistic values around what success should look like, and some aspects of dependency on Western medicine’s pill popping solutions (I am not against Western medicine AT ALL. It has saved my life many times), we’ve slowly grown dependent on sources outside of ourselves to feel safe and secure, and ultimately devalued our own wombs. If everything in society is pointing to the devaluation of women, calls periods and tampons gross, positions pleasure as taboo, and praises structured masculine programs instead of the soft, pleasurable, creative energy of the female essence, then why on Earth would we expect to value this ourselves in this way?
It’s so unfortunate, but that’s why it’s time that we wake up. Sometimes it takes a wakeup call like a reproductive issue to shake us in our boots and turn within. To confront our deepest fears and surrender to the unknown. Despite how painful and traumatic rupturing cyst after cyst was, I am so fucking grateful to have had that experience for four years so I could reconnect with my own womb and step back into my power as a divine feminine women. My whole life purpose changed, my body, mind and spirit healed, and I am more my authentic self than ever. I can finally breathe again and feel so in love and grateful for my body.
Now, it’s a priority for me to connect with my womb daily, and because I know we have no one telling us why or how women should do this, I wanted to outline some clear, easy ways you could do this on the daily. Read on for 7 simple ways to connect with your womb every day for a more pleasurable, aligned, abundant, creative, healthy, happy, and peaceful life:
Educate yourself on your cycle. Understanding your own body, physiology, and anatomy is so important. This allows you to connect more deeply with your womb, manage your needs as your hormones fluctuate, and also tells your body that you have its full attention.
Ask your womb to guide you. Every morning before you reach for your phone or do anything, close your eyes and place your hands on your womb. Breathe deeply into this sacred space and ask her to guide you. Ask your womb what she needs today. Ask her to be your guide. Journal out or note anything that comes through.
Connect with your menstrual cycle. Can you name the four cycles of menstruation right now and explain how they each work? I couldn’t four years ago. Familiarize yourself with your cycle so that you know what’s happening in your body, can better identify imbalance, and know how to take care of yourself during each cycle (because, of course, it’s going to be different in each one)
Prioritize pleasure. How often were you taught that you should be allowing yourself to receive pleasure? Our society is built on “give give give” not “receive receive receive,” in addition to pleasure being so taboo. Pleasure extends outside of sex, even though I encourage you to explore your own sexual alchemy as well. Allow pleasure in by slowing down, being gentle, and taking care of yourself.
Receive more than you give. If you give more than you receive or work more than you play, you are in your masculine energy. As women it is in our nature to be slow, gentle, nurturing, creative, and flowy, this is mimicked in nature. This does not mean we cannot be successful, as success has been wrongly associated with masculine structures (our internal masculine energies are supportive in a healthy, balanced way). Play more than you work. Dance, play, sing, create, and flow. This will help you balance your internal masculine and feminine energies.
Eat to support your cycle. Only after you begin to understand your cycle, can you then learn to eat to support your cycle. I am creating my own charts that will be available in my next program, but I recommend starting with The Happy Hormone Guide to get you started.
Consider alternative therapies. I explore a ton of these in my blog post “How I Healed Myself From Ovarian Cysts,” but to name a few acupuncture, castor oil packs, at-home womb massages, and yoni steams are just some of the ways you can connect more deeply to your womb.